Joy, Freedom and True Happiness Under Pressure and Difficulty
The joy of living we really have, even under pressure and difficulty. (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 15)
We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 83)
Joy, happiness and freedom EVEN UNDER PRESSURE AND DIFFICULTY; these are alien concepts to so many of us. If you are in the world for any period of time it wont take long to realize that the world is like a game of cards: There are good hands and there are bad hands and you gotta know how to deal with both.
One thing that is also true of us working through recovery is that we really don’t have the luxury of freaking out. We either learn to deal with the good and the bad or we haven’t really learned to deal with life.
I was very specific when I said BOTH because some of us cannot handle the bad without freaking out and some of us cannot handle the good without self-destructing.
I do not hold with those who believe that alcoholism is entirely a problem of mental control. I have had many men who had, for example, worked a period of months on some problem or business deal which was to be settled on a certain date, favorably to them. They took a drink a day or so prior to the date, and then the phenomenon of craving at once became paramount to all other interests so that the important appointment was not met. These men were not drinking to escape; they were drinking to overcome a craving beyond their mental control. (Alcoholics Anonymous pgs. xxix-xxx – 4th Edition the Doctor’s Opinion)
He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish. He often possesses special abilities, skills, and aptitudes, and has a promising career ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees. (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 21)
Some of us fall flat on our face from things going too well also. We gotta learn to handle the good and the bad. We have to learn to have happiness and remain free in both. This is something that comes through the process (the passage from page 83 is from “The Promises” that are for those almost through with Step 9), but we have to be aware of it also.
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone – even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 84)
Of course, the timeframe mentioned here is after Step 9 is completed, but this is key also. We are not fighting people and life, we are taking life on life’s terms, one day at a time. We are looking to gain the courage to change the things we can change, the serenity to accept the things we cannot change and the wisdom to know the which are the things we can change and which are the things we cannot.
If you are not at this point, three things are evident:
- Getting through the Steps up to Step Nine seems to be a prerequisite to the expectation of a lot of this, so vigorously working or reworking your Steps is a key
Then there is this:
Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 89)
- When desperate, working with somebody else is a must. If you are feeling uncomfortably bad or uncomfortably good it is not just a choice, it is a must.
- It is not about you!!!! The planet and all the people in it were not specifically placed here to keep you comfortable.
Selfishness – self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 61)
If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful. In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous. He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing. On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest. But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits. (Alcoholics Anonymous pgs. 60– 61)
You cannot try to force or manipulate the world into keeping you comfortable and you cant allow yourself to get angry, indignant, self-pitying or so otherwise uncomfortable that you are in danger.
Joy, freedom and happiness that can sand pressure and discomfort are offered to you. There is hope, but you have to take action to get it.
Stay sober my friends,
- Getting The Right Glasses on the Right Way (wadehrecoverynetwork.wordpress.com)
- The “No Matter What The Consequences” “Go To Any Length” Promises (wadehrecoverynetwork.wordpress.com)
- What “Recovery” Is and Isn’t (bangordailynews.com)